A few months ago I wrote a post on Choosing Joy and following your Passion.
And I still believe it to be true.
Though not noticeable to many, if any at all, over the past month or so I slowly sank into a very deep depression. So much so it was only in the past few days, it hit me how much I had down spiraled.
In many ways, I am saddened. But this is not a pity party. It is about finding the strength to pick oneself back up when the going has gotten so tough, you live on autopilot and are literally numb. That’s the issue with a chemical imbalance. You do not see it manifest until literally, you cannot recount the days, work like a maniac and then crash and burn.
And I wonder. While I hashtag #expectimperfect on my Instagram, how many people who I am so lucky to have had taken an interest in my feed, fully understand the honesty and depth of the phrase, what lies behind it and the multitude of sins it covers.
I wonder if they see the motivational posts and believe there is perfection behind it, or if they understand there is a deep journey in progress.
That it is more than just my hashtag. This is a genuine journey, becoming a butterfly after being cocooned by my life, my circumstances, and my life choices.
Transparency in a world of filters.